The last man I loved, one of only two. Today I came to a realisation about said man. One that I think I've known for a while but conveniently suppressed. I adored this man, I've blogged about him before. The first man I met from the internet, the man who was engaged to another woman. Him telling me he didn't want more children, he already had 3. He then impregnated the fiance and has since had a baby to his current partner. It took years for him to tell me he loved me. I'll never forget when he finally told me, first on the screen and then in person. I remember him telling me he couldn't love me how I deserved blah blah. Today the lightbulb went off, I guess in light of the conversation I had yesterday. He loved me purely because I loved him. He did not love me, he loved that I loved him. I've probably written this all before but I've become a master at emotional supression I can't even remember.
Don't love somone just because they love you.
Don't fuck someone just because they are attracted to you.
Be true to yourself, to what you feel.
You set off my biggest trigger, I dreamt about the connection. I just didn'tknow it'd be this.
PEACE AND LUST
SEXY JESS
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