For so long

And I mean SO LONG! I have wanted him! I have wanted him since I was 14! Over 10 years I have lusted for him, I projected that lust on to his brother for years. The sexual tension was crazy, people always thought we were a couple, but I always told him no and he knew to never bring up the subject of his brother!

For one fleeting night years ago we ended up in my bed, drunk and frisky. We kissed briefly, I put my hand on his cock and like a flash he was out of there!

Now after on again off again flirtation and contact we touched again! He is always wanting to meet, in the car, for a quickie. I don't want that, I want it to last, I want passion, I want it to be worth the wait. Fate stepped in last week and he was working on a building next to a dingy motel I was staying at for work. I walked out the door at 6:30am and there he was sitting in his car. Did he arrive early to try and see me? As he'd told me he'd seen me the previous day and tried to get my attention but failed. Am I deluded to even entertain that idea? He yelled out to me, we said hello I packed my car and then we awkwardly sat in our respective cars. I didn't want to leave, I wanted him. I sat struggling between my desire and my knowledge that he has a partner and a baby now, something that broke my heart a little. I'd only just been Facebook stalking him the night before as I hadn't seen his pics in a while, he was gone. Did I subconsciously know? He drove around the back and I went to 'say hello' I stood at his door making unwanted small talk. His hands reached for me. Feeling me, I was on fire. He is one of the only men in my life I had openly thrown myself at. We began to kiss me still standing him in the drivers seat. I moved to sit on his lap, he pulled up my top and took my nipple in his mouth. My lust out if control but I knew at any moment another 10 workers were going to exit the building. I couldn't control myself, I needed his lips, he whispered for me to suck him, I said no. I could feel him unzipping his pants as we kissed and he had his face in my top I stroked his cock! 'Oh fuck' it was all he could say. He came and I had a hand covered in his cum. He handed me a spare work shirt to clean up.

He wanted me to stay but with that I left. I didn't trust myself to stay. I want him too much, I may need him. I wish he was mine.